HAPPY EDUCATOR'S DAY!!

happy educator's aka teacher's, guider's etc etc etc day.
to me, for the first time!!!
we will have potluck tomorrow.
buntu memikirkan nak bawak ape.
bajet nehi heyyy.. gaji still not in.. huwaaaa
and i have a bundle of 4 classess's exam papers to be marked.
ade jugaks i bawak diri je as the lucky-pot esok.

10 years back, i never thought i'll be a teacher.
would my ten-years-ago self wish me 'congratulation' if we could meet and have a chat?

darnn..if we could meet and chat, i'll tell my 10-years-old-younger me to study harder and stop playing around. and pay attention in the class. and stop skipping class. and not to talk useless stuff in the class. and to finish the homework on time. and and and and and the soooo many more that i regret of doing now.

in conclusion, smoke kills.
really!!
suddenly rase nak marah. all this bertambun2 papers to be marked waited 2 days for me to get started. thanks to the those who smoke and throw away their cig as they wished and cause the 5 acre field at the back of my house caught fire. :( i had to leave my house, as the thick smoke chased us...hard to breath, harder to see. today, after 2 days that event occurred, we could still smell it.

now and then

third week reflection not done yet.
camping is the reason.
so I had this camping, the first one ever as a school teacher. I dont even know how to pack my clothes for school camping!!!
now, thats not the story.
Day 1-Night 1;  I was the loyal-manager (read:urusetia) for the first night. shift 7 pm tp 7 am.
the camp site was merely 7km from my house, but the students seems to be 'buat macam rumah sendiri' more than me. I was in total disbelief to see them walking around with ice-blended juice, coconut shakes, eating burgers at midnight, playing guitar while watching you-tube guitar lesson and many more. During my age, I was only given the famous ever Sardin Ayam Brand you know!! Oh yes, and teh o or kopi o as the other drinks besides plain mineral water. 2014 and my students had ayam masak merah, chicken chops, black pepper and blabla for their camping meals and they just google from youtube and webs for great ideas to perform on the kebudayaan night. COOL? Mehhhhh...they should google the definition of real camping! Too bad, the camping site is also close to the famous dating/sightseeing/dining/relaxing beach hence the so many stalls to sell things from A to Z. They even have ice delivery van-to-tent service. You had it soooo easy mannn... not going for the details of teachers leaving students or teachers leaving officers..too funny and too shameful.

Week 4: Today, I was the guru bertugas, and someone, as always blocked my car. There are 5 empty berbumbung lagi parking spaces, and perhaps up to 30 tak berbumbung parking spaces there but this particular one car really love to park behind me. Its not a problem when I am always the 10th last person to check out but it is a big mess when a sick student had to be rush to the clinic and damn as I put my car on 'R' gear and then realised there is a car at the back. grrrrrrrrrr.... marah nihhhhh... the sick student had to suffere her ears as well to hear me 'saying a lottt' uhuks. After the sick student case settled, I had few minutes off to gosok2 the bruises left on my car-the bumper. ebdhbuchajgcbhdjkdbudkjjnxzk. As I was still furious and really intended to find the car owner (cikgu baru dah mula nak mengamokkk) suddenly, there's a fire drill. Ease my job. That car and few other cars (and the owners of course) were criticized and warned by the fellow cool bomba guys during the taklimat. Even bomba pun tak lepas nak masuk..means I taklah teruk sangat parking skill kan?? Senang kijo, now pengetua gave order no more cars there. heeeeeee . this is soooo doa orang teraniaya termakbul u know. I wish I will be able to gather some courageous in me to propose to the pengetua to let the teachers bertugas to park their cars at the most easily accessible area. But then...yelah...  susah jugak when have to stay cool and act zero all the time just because you are new. But insyaAllah, Allah knows better .. there'll be  ways. :)

Speaking of 'now and then' again. A new student came in today. From my former school, surprisingly. And she came while complaining the too many students in a class and the lack of proper classroom to have a lesson in that school and had to use the labs most of the time, -not surprisingly.
The principal didnt wait for a few more seconds to hear my response to her complains. My answer; " I myself experienced having a lesson under the tree, sitting in the drain some more. No proper classroom and had to have the lesson in the lab is too  NORMAL." Yes, that raised more questions.
It is common people , common. Its a school of 2000++ students, with two sessions. Some classes had to be 'flooted'. I had my lesson in the canteen, the assembly compound, under that sweet tree, at the field, and etc everyday. BUT not everytime of course, just for that switching sessions- morning to noon time. So only 1 or 2 periods of flooting... and I honestly dont feel bad about it. Cool giler. Fresh air, cool scenery, bebas keluar masuk therough any invisible doors, free seating (both style and position) :P
I got A for English for the very first time during one of those under the trees classes and yet today this girl complained yadaa yaadaaa yaadaaa blablabla about it.
now and then.
cool and supercool.

an expensive dream

"What do you wish to buy with your first salary?"

Thursday, so its the end of the week already. Hence, time for a short reflection to ponder, or wonder, or both.

Yesterday I had a lesson with my students, the topic was "Dream".
The question above was the last question asked in that lesson. I checked their works later and was surprised to read one of them. 
One of my boys wrote "I want to but a cow". 
At first I chuckled. Funny. Then I reread it, and thought maybe he wanted to spell 'car' but wrote 'cow' instead. (its the last class of the form). But no, it is 'cow'. There's already a 'car' mention earlier for other questions/tasks.
So why didn't he just put 'car', 'house', 'handphone' (common expected answers)? 
a check on his background,+ the school's background. Yes the road to the school is fullllled with lots of poo poo from the cow. And 1/3 of the students there live in the hostel. Their family cant afford to send them daily, too far and no transport. Hence, actually having a lembu is already a sign of wealth to them. No ferrari, no bungalow. A cow is indeed very much valuable. His dream is not very far, he just want to be a 'cow's keeper'. I wonder if I can have such modest thought myself. And even wonder, if I can at least make his dream slightly bigger- an owner of a cow farm who can speak English well.

i owed him for this lesson.

a lesson to appriciate everything i have now, and be grateful for the thing that isnt mine, for it must be not mine anymore/yet for a very good reason. 

it is a really deep kind of 'teguran' dear. 

p/ss: what do you want to buy with your first salary? reallly?

fooled no more

1st April is not an 'april-fool' scheme by our minister.
I was posted, finally at my very own hometown.
:)

count down

tick tock tick tock

ringggggggg

April 1st passed...
April 2nd passed...and later April 3rd, 4th, 5th..and the rest follows..

Today, its April 13th. Ehhurm, its been a year after i visited haramain..missed those moment. time flies 'rapidly' as always..

approximately 13 more days to come an go before i bid my final farewell to my life as a practical teacher. and only 10 days, just 10 days to be with my students. to be angry or falling in love with them. to be happy or feeling sad.

Yesterday, i had my last lesson with them for the next week planned. haha..semangat. to be honest, i planned that lesson since the second week of pratikum. Things that i want to do most with them.
lets see what would happen. hopefully i'll be free from observation by then.

Katy visited us last week. to my surprise, she arrived at 8 in the morning to observe my one period lesson. of course i didnt see that coming, i thought its going to be double period only- observation kan??? it is the very day that i decided to do some experimenting with my teaching skill: to teach grammar. i am super duper crap at grammar..so i never have even a little confidence in me to teach grammar. but of course, you cant change your lesson plan right in front of her.

and yes, for once in my whole life i felt better and finally i feel like i can be a teacher. why? because i did the explanation part well. so you know the feeling of seeing you ss students so bright because they can understand what you are saying? even though it is GRAMMAR? i felt great and went over the sky and the moon and almost reach jupiter when i suddenly realised that i almost forget the most crucial task for that lesson aka the b.o....muahahaha...

anyway katy and my sv thanks for the tips and comments..i really appreciate it, would do my best to improve all the weaknesses and to maintain all the good part. and for my ss...you know i cant even feel nervous throughout the lesson to see your reaction..-first time got orang puteh in your class. even the loudest boy in my class turned 100% SILENT and only talked to me once in the lesson- tu pun to ask for my permission to go to the toilet. see what orang puteh can do to my ss.
if mh were to come to our school..if..i-d-k what would happen then. he won't right? haihh..

off or of technology?

the last lesson i had with my form 1 ss on technology, i asked them;
what would the world be without the technology? do you think it is going to be better or worst?

my ss gave various responses..
most of them think technology brings no good to the society..perhaps thanks to Albert Einstein quotes too...

*i showed this picture at the beginning of the lesson just to see their responses and elicits more ideas for the debate lesson that day..yeah..memang a handfullllllsss of ideas lah jugak coming...

anyway, to try the theory myself, since my phone live-shy-die-refuse for days dah... i started to live without it as the school holiday begins, and later off with the social network as well..

well, i kinda survived.
what do you want to know so so so much from facebook? twitter? instagram? whatsapp? bbm? today, we heard a thousand stories, not even one we can trust totally, we saw many things, but none we can surely believe.
hidup dalam gua pun kadang kala lagi bercahaya, so long as you change your definition of cahaya.

i miss my family.
so so much.
spending this few days ignoring the world and focusing on them makes me feel happier.
few days more to go, i'll be leaving again,. treasure those around you while you can. you dont know how painful it is, when you have to just 'regret'.

In the midst of hardship..

had to borrow the poem's title this time..

its been two weeks in a row my life took place in such situation, sharing more or less the same theme with the poem..

not really flood issue,
nor albino buffalo neither..

just some hardship issues that one may encounter in life.
but having two of different kind back to back like this..

this is a story i shall kept for my own life lesson in future.
alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah..thank you Allah.
those who stayed with me during such moment, thanksssss a million.
family and friend, who am i without you..
adding to the list, my dearest students..it was for them and because of them,
i could still standing and continue teaching, babbling, laughing like nothing ever happened.

recent? just as i thought its over, in the midst of hardship season three begins... ya rabb..help me, help us, keep us strong to handle this...

Our friends - Form 1

Lesson 1: Grammar wh questioning techniques

Task 2: Encouraging friend's ambition/dream;

****************

Food and Health- Form 1

Lesson 1: Introduction to the food pyramid....

SS work: "We shouldn't eat ...... regularly because it is ...."/ 

"We should eat ...... regularly because it is...."

Lesson 2: Adjectives to describe food.

SS works: I like to eat ......... because it is............

Done with 'food and health' chapter.

wake up!

back to reality.
back to school again after 2 weeks off.
carrying rph book around from 7 am to 3pm.

and so tomorrow,
i believe i can fly......

"astro"

its been a while since i last updated this blog.
being a teacher-even more as a practical teacher do put my life a bit upside down.
so today, i'm back at my hometown.
wrap-up session to conclude the practikum phase 1 with our tutor ended beautifully...
lotsa ideas, solution, sharing here and there. that should be the best session ever. i guess.

i planned to upload stuff that i used for my class here everyday, but even checking fb is something i found really hard to do..what more blogging...

once a month boleh kot.....
so these are 'who my students are'
form 1: from 26 in the first week reduced to 24 for 2 weeks and quickly grew to become a 28 students- (and more to come) class. fun to teach. very active. dare to voice out their thought-including commenting my lesson plan.. very cepat-pikap, very competitive. mostly are advanced students few-less than 5 students are quite weak in english. quite playful too. always have something to say about my baju kurung, tudung, appearance, routine, habits, and even my toilet-schedule (like siyesly sgt) and etc. very adorable that i had to hold my laugh everytime i intedned to scold them. very dengar kata. i like.

form 4: 37 students. i have different things to say about this class every week. week 1: gave up, feel like crying-well, actually i did cry. week 2: disappointed- feel like quiting teaching. my voice even melantun back to me after i screamed at them at one particular angry-bird stage. week 3: hello, nice to meet and know you. week 4:i hate the fact that i will leave you for 2 weeks, cant wait to see you after the break. after 4 weeks; my f4 are ss with medium to low ability in english. they are willing to learn, but i must be very keen to teach first. and they are sweets. and i really do love them.

sungai nil dan tembok besar china.

sore it is.
deep. deep down in my heart.

true, but i found myself had to accept and learn; sebaik-baik tempat mengadu ialah Allah swt.
bukan pada manusia. walau sedekat serapat seakrab manapun.

Wahai Tuhan yang membolak balikkan hati, tetapkan hati kami, kuatkan iman kami.

rows

lets talk about thursday, shall we?
yes, i'm late by a day. its friday now, bak kata rabecca....
after almost a year, i was listening to that song just now..how lifeless one could be to be playing that song?
at 4 in the morning?

#this is my first weekend/night without my roomate....

we all need that now, a melarikan diri project, solo or berkumpulan.
should have gone back yesterday too..right after i handed in that cs thingy. right after our malay class. right after my most lingkaran gelap bawah mata day...huahuahua..kononlah....
its getting weirder everyday... 36 days left.
i don't really know which one is the worst one.
that hit so badly...
is it this one assignment per week thing?
yeah....every thursday is a submission day for all sort of assignment. at least xdelah satu khamis sampai 10 kene submit kan? tapi still....xdan nak bernafas..jadinya friday je yg tarik nafas n hembus kejap. sabtu get back on work.......kelas,kelas,kelas,kelas, submit something else now.
or is it the things with this place? the rules that i'm not keen of?the 'runaway' card that was always 'being misplaced'... the not so good news i received two or perhaps nearly three weeks ago? the so many websites blocked here and there? have no idea...... clearly, i'm not coping well with this.

i'm terrible at time management. i dont need anyone to tell me that. but...
there's one more thing i'm terrible at; lipat baju. being doing that since 10pm last nite. tak siap2 jugak..... i have always hated it. lipat baju.... please...something else? basuh baju pun better lagi dari lipat tau...

looking forward for the first thursday  yang takde bulatan merah sekelilingnya on my calendar after a while..yeah, of course. forum. seminar. lawatan. didn't circle that.they dont weigh the same as assignment.aite?..so..macam lega sedikit di situ..sedikits lah..sedikits..lama-lama boleh jadi bukit. like my baju-baju yang kene lipat nih..kan?





*anyway, thanks to that someone; tomorrow is definitely gonna be a better day.

Crapping..

Public speaking.
So it was today.
it was this morning.
and i was the one who took the paper with number 1 written on it.
God is great. He gives me many great friends.
My trembling feet, ears, eyes, kidney, and etc should be more than enough to beg helps from them.
So timi did it first instead. Oh, should i actually mention this? arh...just let it out, so...actually i was thinking, if i am extra lucky today, i might get my LTP group to present first too! hoooorayyy!!

anyway, lets talk about the public speaking again. I had my first and last one in 2005. It went...horrible! To cut it short, the teacher in charge refused to talk with me after that, until...today..yeah, today lah, dah after school i never actually meet her again.
-clearing throat-

so, as promised, he reminded zizi last night about it, with a promise that the audience is gonna be just us, 24. minus farah who is currently at her brother's wedding in Selangor. so, just 23. plus him, 24 again. eh..ok stop.
So, guess what? As i predicted,he, of course would have invited other classes as well. HEy its product of UK talking in public!!!! Like seriously -__-

so tadaaaaa... so many people, some sitting, some standing.
good. i was surprised. really.
so no magic happened to me. last night i was praying so hard, make it easy for me....amin. i dont know, something like, storm, fire emergency, i fall sick, yeah anything that would delay this. anything. ANYTHING.

But NOTHING happened. nothing as i imagined. so it went like this, i stood there, chickened. andbabbling around, from UK to my friends, and how lovely they are, and then to the library, the printing services, assignment, the guards, to the rules, to the cafe, the food,  to the public speaking, to people, facebook, twitter, and even, myself. oh yeah, en even pengarah. like seriously.

and then i left.

lets pray for a better tomorrow peeps!

prodigious dreams

to wake up and stop yourself from living in a dreamland that would never get real is hard isn't it?

so hi again blog yang telah berlabah-labah, kerengga dan semut api.

lama tak jumpa..

i think, i left this when i'm still in the UK. try to get back to you but my smartphone apparently is just another lame superstupidphone as it touch down KLIA. huhu. so, lotsa pending posts coming....

so how was that 'mainan' ?

well...it went greatly fine. like seriously. biasalah cabaran sikit-sikit kan? some people can't accept the fact that things have changed, and will keep on changing. let this change too please. #dream 1

insyaAllah i will stay the way i wanna be, the way which i believe is the best for me till my last day, with His will of course. InsyaAllah, that would not change. amin. #dream 2

hey, being back here (Malaysia) is not that bad actually. lotsa conflicts, firstly within yourself, with you clock, watch and alarms, with the weather, the systems, rules, etc etc.  but here as in (maktab) is well.... hurm, stop complaining. that should wrap up the whole situation well aite? things will get better. #dream 3

giler malas nak tulis. dah tu nape gatal jugak tulis. sebab aku rase macam dah makin bodoh sebab lama tak taip ape-ape. english or even bahasa. teruk sangat dah. berkarat yang terengganu kate; 'karat dekkoh' (extremely lousy level) hopefully hipotesis semakin rajin maka semakin pandai akan berjaya jadi nyata, #dream 4.

i ate popia nestum far too much lately. dah jadi macam baby sangat dah kan? makanya, time to sleep. pukul 12 is super lewat sangat dah...kbai,.assalamualaikum. 

LIMA

"Boleh tak kami nak..ambil lima?" (FM 2012).

It was quite a LOL, yes indeed it is.
But honestly,
At the moment.. I do need, infact more than 5..

untunglahh!!

beruntunglah orang-orang itu.
Bukankah terlalu beruntung mereka?

Beruntungnya orang-orang yang sedang menyayangi seseorang pada hari ini, kerana mampu menyayangi seseorang itu juga adalah satu nikmat besar yang sungguh mahal, dan telah Allah berikan percuma kepada kita. ada orang yang tak mampu merasa sayang sesama manusia. maka masyarakat kita ada yang jadi pembunuh. ada orang yang tak mampu untuk sayang pada haiwan dan alam. maka kita juga ada para perosak. ada orang juga, yang hilang rasa sayang pada diri sendiri.. maka, mereka juga telah selamat hilang.

So...let's sayang menyayang, dan jadi orang beruntung itu!!!

mainan

orang kata, mimpi tu mainan tidur. tapi kalau betul mainan, how come kadang tu, bila jaga hati kita berdegup kencang macam taufan? mata kita berair tahan tsunami.. bukan ker mainan itu entertainment? hati patut girang, riang..
So, tak semua mimpi adalah mainan, or at least tak semua adalah patung barbie atau kerete kebal dan doll house.
Mungkin sebab kita tak selamnya budak.
Bila dewasa, mimpi yang menakutkan is no longer equal to mimpi hantu. Mimpi kenyataan lagi menakutkan.
Kata pakar yg anonymous, dalam tidur kita dlm separa sedar. maka benda-benda yg kita fikir masa jaga, sgt fikir or ape jelah akan dtg dlm mimpi. aku risau. sangat. sebab itu mainan ni datang setiap malam. mimpi sama over and over again. those that I worry about so so much is coming closer. and even closer when close my eyes.
InsyaAllah it would not happen. insyaAllah.

TEN

its been wonderful.
a month full with lots of wonderful events, beautiful moments and significant memory for me.

hari ini, kaki dan tangan pun akan mula membebel if they can talk.
pulang dari sleepover td, terbump parents amal. ramah orangnya. menggamit jiwa betul bila tengok kawan-kawan yang dah bersatu dengan family mereka.
huuu..

penat pulang, bersiap terus ke asda, pulang asda pergi lunch date with my housemates n gadiz shipping. next, city. mencari-cari. ada yang jumpa ada yang tidak. pergi city untuk say goodbye kat H&M, Primark dan rakan-rakan yang benyak berjasa selama 3 tahun ni. eh, lupa nak goodbye kat Costa..kena pergi lagilah ni..kikiki..

pulang, sambung lagi. baru je selesai with my weekly kuliah. alhamdulillah. another great sharing. insyaAllah will be bermanfaat for me, and to for others too. ^__^ nilah actually part paling nerves bila pikir dah dekat nak balik. siapa akan terkejut, dan dikejutkan? macam mana kalau aku yang terkena culture shoch kat negara sendiri, satu scenario yang menurut Roishin adalah normal untuk dialami. for 3 years stay. aduh, risau risau. serahkan pada Dia. insyaAllah.

insyaAllah ;
esok hari shipping, hurm... seronok. lega sikit rumah after this.
lusa, bertolak ke Warwick. Conventry. bertemu mereka yang aku dah mula merindu.
tulat..haha..sampai tulat planningnye; Loughborough in Leicester-shire area.. lebih kuranglah...new journey. semoga segalanya berjalan dengan lancar. niat yang penting kan? :)

penat kan jari? one good news for you my dear fingers, people said; dont count after ten, coz the kids can do that for ya.. sapelah people tuh.hehe.. with that, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, and one day before we leave. lau aku rajen, aku jenguklah kau wahai blog, i have many other things to say bye to too. haha.
dah.
bye.
assalamualaikum.

sebelas

eleven days before we leave this place, we had our yet not really last farewell gathering.
apa-apa pun, we wont really part..as we could always gather in our hearts kan?

this time, at paverell, my juniors house and later ended with late evening tea/milo/horlicks/etc at mutleys' gang place.
lawak betul dari kes usaha menjadi bomba tak bertauliah, hingga menjadi commentar tak bersijil untuk setiap iklan kat tv. haddoiyy.. kesian juniors kami, mesti konpius habis tengok seniors yang macam tak pernah jumpa tv seumur hidup.

mereka, adik-adik kami yang kami pernah cukup jauh walaupun dekat suatu ketika dahulu.
sebelah dinding je. tapi jauh sangat hubungan tuh.
sekarang, bila nak berjarak lautan pacific, hindi,dan even china selatan..dan apalagi tak tau..huhu geography probs skit, maps n globe plak dah masuk kotak shipping..abaikan..
dah nak berjauh, physically.. sedang hati kami cukup rapat lately..

kenang kami dalam doamu. hee...ayat cliche tapi tulah..nak mintak apelagi kan. still, insyaAllah lau umur panjang, ade rezeki mungkin kita akan masih jumpe after this..who knows? =only Allah. :)

no pitchas..
yet. kot.

the sleepover pun best, sebab boleh overslept sekali kan.. haha.
adik-adik yang baik, i really mean it when i said this. siyesly, baik. sangat-sangat. bertuah kami.
^___________^